Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Mother of the Year

Well, as the year comes to a close, I guess I should give out some awards for the best whatever of the year. While it's possible this is the only category I'll do, and I'm only using it as a way to setup this post, try to ignore that, it's a fast day and I'm getting thirsty.

The inaugural mother of the year (apologies to my own mother for coming in 2nd this year, better luck next time), Mrs. Lynne Spears!

Not only did she give birth to the rebbetzin, who has had her own issues this year since we decided to take a break, she also has another daughter, a 16 year old daughter, the lovely in that sort of looks like Britney way, Ms. Jamie-Lynn Spears. Jamie-Lynn seemed to be starting a nice career for herself, appearing on the bastardized terrible version of All That, as well as getting her own show on Nick, Zoey 101.

But wait, she's preggers!

That's right, this 16 year old mini-Britney is preggers. My favorite quote about the whole thing comes from our honoree, who said, "I didn't believe it because Jamie-Lynn's always been so conscientious. She's never late for her curfew".

Okay, Lynne, I can call you Lynne right, unless you're the type of mother-in-law who prefers I call you Mom, either way, you suck as a parent. Never late for curfew? Spazz, she's either sneaking out afterwards, sneaking him in beforehand, or partaking in some afternoon delight.

And that, along with all the other news a certain special someone has been making this past year that we'll try to forget, is why Lynne Spears is the inaugural Jeter Christ Mother of the Year. You make Kathy Hilton look like Norma Arnold. Jeter Christ Almighty you suck at parenting.

In the other news of the day, Bill Parcells is going to be joining the Atlanta Falcons as a director of football operations, whatever that means. As long as he doesn't try to steal Jason Garrett away, I don't care. UPDATE: Apparently, he's turning them down and considering a similar offer from the Dolphins.

And finally, the official roommate of the blog, the one, the only, Taz Marelof is celebrating his 21st birthday. If you're not partaying tonight with him in honor of the occasion, the least you can do is go to his blog and click on his ad, and/or contribute to the lap-dance fund. Your call.

What the shuffle decided I should listen to: "Rock Star"-Kells/Luda/Kid Rock, that song is ridiculously good, "Piece of Me"-Britney, how appropriate.

1 comment:

elie said...

Nice "Wonder Years" reference. If there is any justice in the world they will go after the father for statutory rape.